The Tobacco is Sleeping

The trip south to my mother’s birthplace began every year at 4 in the morning. My father wanted to

be clear of Manhattan before rush hour began, so I only ever saw the Empire State Building in a groggy state, and wouldn’t be alert and in full realization that I was headed south again until we were on the great barren expanse of the New Jersey Turnpike.

Then it was on to US Route 1/301 from which there was no escape until we veered off around Fayetteville and headed east into coastal North Carolina where Spanish moss hung from the trees like the night swamp level of a Crash Bandicoot game.

I would always know when we made the cross-over from North to South when we passed a tobacco

Current (2019) state of the Quiet the Tobacco is Sleeping Sign

warehouse in Richmond, Virginia, where a big sign told us to be quiet, “the tobacco is sleeping.” My father would point out this landmark every year in case we were too buried in misery in the backseat to notice.

This has been fresh in my memory lately because today, I work near that same warehouse on US Route 1/Jefferson Davis Highway, an unexpected turn of events. Except for Dr Pepper – which announced its approach with round 10-2-4 signs along the highway as we got closer to North Carolina -- there was nothing in the South for me.

Aside: (10, 2 and 4 were the recommended times to drink a Dr Pepper and receive the energy boost it promised. You could not get a Dr Pepper north of the Mason-Dixon line back then, just like you cannot get the king in the North drink – White Rock Cream Soda – down here. Not even now.)

The tobacco is sleeping sign has been gone for many decades. In fact, I don’t remember ever seeing it as an adult, and the abandoned warehouse has crumbled into itself like many of the buildings on the once vibrant U.S. Rt. 1 thoroughfare.

Between 1959 and 1963, I-95 opened along the Mid-Atlantic states, and all the through traffic took the exit. By 1984, tobacco ceased being king. The National Tobacco Council killed the National Tobacco Festival and its parade in Richmond, and its replacement, the Autumn Harvest Grand Illuminated Parade didn’t last very long. No one cared about waking up the tobacco anymore.

But now, as I leave work every day, I notice some activity in the acreage where the tobacco once napped. It’s going to become apartments, or condos, or some kind of great living experiment for Generation Z, the spawn of the millennials, a place where they can share kitchens and community space when they’re not staring at laptops in a group workspace near their dorm-like sleeping quarters. Many of the warehouses in  the surrounding area of Old Town and Manchester are transitioning. Route 1 may yet see a revival from the salvaged hubcap and recapped tire wasteland it became and become a village of craft beer and flavored coffees.

Why Game of Thrones Had the Right Ending

The writers of the Game of Thrones series finale did a creditable job of figuring out where each character should end up. After two major battle episodes, in Winterfell and Kings Landing, I don’t think viewers would have had the patience to go through three more episodes of exposition to explain why the writers made the decisions they made. Viewers complained it felt rushed because it was missing those scenes, but to add on even one extra episode of internal politics would have ended the series on a flat note. A lot was left out, but they cut to the chase in each instance and any viewer who had been following the series can easily fill in the scenes that were not shown.

1) Obviously, neither Daenerys nor Cersei could be victorious in the end. They were both essentially too evil. Viewer complaints were there was not enough character development to explain why Daenerys could destroy Kings Landing and kill most of the residents between the shore and the Red Keep -- but there was. Her father was power crazy; her brother who sold her was power crazy; it runs in the family. She burned a lot of people before and didn’t have a track record of being benevolent. It didn’t matter that her previous victims were bad people. In her eyes, all Cersei’s subjects were bad people. And she had already told Jon she would rule by fear. Although she talked a good game of peace, love, understanding and prosperity like most dictators, it was all talk. In reality, her people were enslaved to her to keep fighting her non-stop wars. We believed her because it sounded good…and she was so beautiful. What could go wrong?

Daenerys had to go, and Jon was the only one who could get past Drogon and be ultimately forgiven by Drogon because Drogon recognized him as a Targaryen and accepted his decision. Drogon correctly put the cause of death as the iron throne.

2) Cersei could not be rescued by Jaime and boated away to live in peace and raise her inbred child in Pentos or anywhere. If she had lived to escape, she would have constantly nagged Jaime about raising an army and going back to take over Kings Landing again. She would not have let it go. She would have staged a comeback one way or another. She had to die. If she was winning the war when Jaime arrived, Jaime would have had to kill her like Jon did Daenerys for the greater good. And he would not have been able to emotionally after the baby was born and she was gearing up for her comeback, so it had to be now.

His seemingly unnecessary fight with Euron Greyjoy was to mortally injure Jaime so we didn’t feel that sorry for him dying trying to rescue Cersei. He might have made it to Cersei and out of the Keep in time. And then what? We’d be back to the unworkable scenario where Cersei would not accept exile. As stupid as that fight with Euron was, it was necessary to the story to delay and cripple Jaime so there was no possible hope for Cersei’s survival. And for fans who actually liked Jaime and Cersei, there was some satisfaction in seeing them die in each other’s arms. Come on, admit it, that was sad.

If they had escaped, would he have ever returned to Brienne? No. He couldn’t live in Winterfell, and that’s where Brienne’s job is. He’d be a traitor for letting Cersei escape, so he basically couldn’t live anywhere. How does a handsome man with one hand hide? Could he just have stayed in Winterfell with Brienne and never gone to Kings Landing? That was the original plan. But no. He got on a horse because it looked like Cersei was winning after Euron successfully killed the dragon Rhaegal. All they needed was one more good shot. He left Winterfell believing she might win and he’d have to kill her, and only he could get between her and the Mountain, just like only Jon could get between Daenerys and Drogon.

3) Jon Snow could not be king, no matter that he was heir to the throne. He didn’t want it. He was famous for not wanting it. And he didn’t have any king-qualities. He was brave and honest and did the right thing (like Ned Stark), but he was not a good decision maker. He was too gentle of heart. He was too romantic. Like Ghost, he was meant to be in the North. The whole punishment of going back to the Night’s Watch was just a scam to shake off the Unsullied’s demand for justice. Tyrion knew it, but he had to pretend anyway until the Unsullied left town. Jon in his heart knew it. He even asked, there’s still a Night’s Watch? He knew it was just an exile, but an exile with people he was comfortable with and his best friends Ghost and Tormund at his side. He can still visit Sansa from time to time. Who would know? Sansa rules over an independent kingdom and the Unsullied left the peninsula. Maybe Ygritte has a sister. Jon was never going to be king. It would not have worked, so just forget thinking that was the proper ending. We got the proper ending for Jon, and we knew it when he didn’t say good-bye to his direwolf. That was a red flagged clue he would see that wolf again.

4) Why did Greyworm have to be placated at all? Especially since he was leaving town anyway? Because he wasn’t leaving until he got justice. So there was a two-three week period that we didn’t see with the Unsullied and Dothraki in command of the city, all mad because of Daenerys. Greyworm – with his inborn slave mentality – couldn’t step up and be king. He wanted someone to tell him what to do, and he needed someone he respected to tell him. He knows that's how kingdoms work. So with Tyrion and Jon in jail for treason (letting Jaime go) and murder (queenicide), Davos probably had to send out some ravens immediately to convene all the regional leaders to rush to the dragon pit and somehow take back control of Kings Landing from the Unsullied and spring Tyrion and Jon from death row. Did we really need an episode explaining all that? No. Cut to the chase where the regional leaders convene. A king is selected, who names Tyrion his hand, so Greyworm, like it or not, has to accept the ruling and leave town, with the assurance Jon is going to a miserable exile on the wall (not). It took a council to free them from the clutches of the embittered Unsullied (or just Greyworm, the other guys are probably drinking and whoring somewhere, glad to be alive).

5) But why make Bran Stark king? Well, who else, really? We already explained why it couldn’t be Jon. Tyrion made too many critical mistakes – primarily trusting and believing in Daenerys – so he can’t be king, and he’s a Lannister and we’ve all had enough of them. Sansa was a possibility, but could we trust her to be kind and forgiving? Maybe she has gone through too much herself not to harbor an internal crazy queen. She loves the people in the North and is not likely to turn evil on them. That she could rule an independent kingdom was only allowed because Bran was her brother and saw what she endured. Any other king would have said no, and all the others didn’t dare chime in and ask to be independent kingdoms because Bran is not their brother. Also – he could warg into Drogon and smoke them. So that’s what happened.

6) Arya killing the Night King. Again, it couldn’t be Jon, because that would have made him too powerful and deserving to be king, and he was no king. Besides, was it not telegraphed that Arya has been training most of her life for this job? (Although the whole Night King and undead army plot did seem to fizzle out too easily, but it conveniently cleared out the land north of the wall for Jon and the wildlings to repopulate with some security and less winter. So there’s that. That had to be done to get a happy ending for Jon and Ghost. And there’s still a chance for Tormund with Brienne!)

7) Where did Drogon go with Daenerys? Could she be resuscitated like Jon? Did the dragon take her to a red priest? Possibly. But that’s a story for another day. And if anyone ever needs a dragon again, guess who could send him a psychic signal and get Drogon back to fight any evil that might pop up? Jon could. He’s Targaryen.

So, I completely understood the reasons for each of the plot decisions the writers made, and I can appreciate the reason why they didn’t do the extra episode between the killing of Daenerys and freeing Jon and Tyrion from prison because it would have been all talk and attaching notes to ravens and people packing up to travel to Kings Landing, while Tyrion and Jon eat gruel and reflect on their sins.

On YouTube, I’ve watched several videos where the Tubers complain about the ending and give their alternate endings, and although each time I think, well, that would have made a good story, too, in the end – really, think about it -- none of it makes as pure, logical sense as what the GoT writers ultimately came up with. (What you didn’t like, admit it, was not spending another two or three hours with these characters, even as dull as they would have been.)

It’ll be interesting to see what George R.R. Martin comes up with – probably the same ending and more beyond, but with thousands of extra pages of dialogue and adventures of minor characters in order to get there. But don’t hold your breath. That guy is never going to finish this story. Never. He has too much money now, and money always kills creativity. If love is the death of duty, a fat bank account is the death of motivation.

Best Buy Customer Service is Terrible

I started direct messaging Best Buy Support on Twitter.

Me: 30 minutes after buying a TV, I had to return it because the screen was broken. The nearest Best Buy said I had to go back to the Best Buy where I bought it. So I drove there. They said they could not refund or exchange cracked screens. So I left the TV there. I'm out $329. I have never had this kind of retail experience anywhere!

(Note to readers: I've also never had a TV break getting it out of the box, so that was a totally new experience, and I thought exchanging it would not be such a hassle because don't most stores want to keep the customers happy? What about all those stories about people buying monster TVs just to watch the Superbowl and then returning them? It wasn't like I wanted my money back, just an exchange. But the kids at Best Buy were -- nope. You get nothing. And they were shocked when I left the broken TV. Really, what do I want with it? It had a huge crack across the screen. I almost immediately got a reply from "Dave."

Mariane, I do apologize for any inconvenience you may have faced. While our options are mildly limited in scenarios like this, I would love to reach out to the store's leadership team to discuss this situation further. In order to do so, I simply ask that you provide us with the following: Full Name, Email, Phone Number, Purchase Info, Store Location, Individuals You Worked With. Once we have those details we'll be able to proceed further and see what options we have, if any. -- *Dave

Me: Why are you "mildly limited" and options are "if any." That is bad customer service. (I emailed a photo of my receipt as all the info they were requesting seemed invasive.)

Hello again, Mariane. Thank you for following up with us! I hope you don't mind me jumping in here as Dave is currently unavailable. While we appreciate you sharing a copy of your receipt, would you mind also sharing the details Dave specifically requested? I've provided them again for you convenience. Regards, ^Tasha.

(I'm beginning to wonder what the symbols in front of their names mean. So, reluctantly, I provide the information, using an email address I don't usually use, adding  "I dealt with three people in customer service and three in Returns. I did not get their names. I didn't want to make a scene collecting names."

Hello, Mariane. Thank you for sharing these details with us! Devises that are abandoned at our stores and damaged may be recycled, so please know that I'm reaching out to the Glen Allen store in regards to your TV's current status. Once I have more details for you, I will be sure to follow up. Sincerely, ^Tasha

Suddenly, I start getting big newsletter emails to that seldom used email account I gave them about Best Buy sales!

You now signed me up to get sales emails!!! Without asking me? That is terrible customer service, and outrageous considering my treatment in the store.

Hello, Mariane, I hope you are enjoying your day so far. Tasha is not available right now, but we never want to keep our customers waiting for a reply. Our specialists are always required to operate within the Terms of our Privacy Policy, which I've included a link to below. If you are receiving unwanted emails, there should be an option near the bottom where you can opt out or unsubscribe. (Note: There isn't or it is well-hidden.) As of yet, there has not been a response to Tasha's email to the Glen Alln store. Once there is an update, she will check back in with you here. We appreciate your patience as we wait for additional communication on the status of your television. Sincerely, ^Sarah

Me: The TV has a big crack in it and I don't want it back. I would like a refund.

Hello again, Mariane. At this time, please know that a refund may not be possible as the TV may have been recycled after it was left at the store. (Note: Why would that negate the refund?) Furthermore, under our Returns and Exchange Promise damaged items are not considered returnable.
Once I have more details from the store regarding this issue, I will be sure to follow up with you. Thank you, ^Tasha

Hello again, Mariane, I apologize for the secondary message, but I noticed that you mentioned being enrolled into marketing emails in your previous contact which Sarah responded to. I apologize if you did not wish to be enrolled. To elaborate on what occurred, I was unable to locate a customer profile for you, as the purchase was ultimately under who I assume to be your husband's profile as it was put under his Best Buy membership. I created a profile for you to ensure this was appropriately documented under your name, and you were automatically enrolled. As Sarah mentioned, you are able to unsubscribe from our emails, but I've also ensured you've unsubscribed on our end. Please allow some time for this process through our system. Please also be aware that as I see you paid for the TV and it was not your My Best Buy membership, that these memberships are intended for individual use under our My Best Buy terms. Sincerely, ^Tasha.

(Note: I don't know what they are threatening here, since I didn't use my husband's Best Buy card but my own credit card. They asked for my phone number when I was checking out and connected me to his account.)

Hello again, Mariane, I hope this message reaches you well. Please know that I've received word back from our Glen Allen store regarding this issue. Based on the damage incurred, we would not be able to accept this back for a refund. At this time though, the unit has not been recycled. You are welcome to pick up the unit within 60 days of abandonment. Beyond this time frame, the unit will be recycled. Respectfully, ^Tasha

(Note: I come to realize because of the overpoliteness and rigidity of the writing, I am dealing with either automated replies or outsourced people in China or India who are just cutting and pasting in prearranged text.)

Me: There is no way I am ever going to your store again, so I won't be getting the TV.

Hello, Mariane, I see you've been working with Tasha again, and she has already left the office for the day. I will be sure to let her know we received your reply. If you do change your mind, the store will have the television available for 60 days from the date if was left there. If you have questions or concerns we can assist with in the future, please let us know. Sincerely, Sarah, Social Media Specialist

After that, they amazingly put a link where I could rate their customer service with a series of green smiley faces to red unsmiley faces! And that was it. I then went to my credit card website and challenged the charge, so it was put in limbo for 60 days. Then the credit card called me and said Best Buy says you have the TV. I said, I do not, and sent them the series of Direct Messages, so that's where we are now. 

Update: My bank reversed the credit card charges, so I got my money back, and I never made a purchase at Best Buy again.

My Favorite Books as an Amazon Reviewer

Of all the review books I read as a reviewer on Amazon, these were the best. Keep in mind the ones I selected to read were always biographies or histories.

“Finding Chandra” by Scott Higham and Sari Horwitz. A real in-depth look at the disappearance and murder of Washington intern Chandra Levy, and how it was the biggest news ever…until 9/11 happened in the middle of the investigation, and how the D.C. police really did a poor job of finding her body.

“I’m Feeling Lucky: The Confessions of Google Employee Number 59” by Douglas Edwards. This is about the birth of the Google search engine and how the company grew, and it has so much interesting and great material on efficiency and getting organized, and working with different people. I quote from it often at job interviews, but no one has ever been impressed by or hired me on the basis of the Google philosophy on how to get things done.

”A Box of Darkness: The Story of a Marriage” by Sally Ryder Brady. This is about a high society couple that have a great marriage except for certain things, and after the husband dies, she finds out he had this other life where he was gay that she knew nothing about. Something like that. I wrote a very detailed and studied review because I was so taken by this story, and it’s lost forever now, probably one of the better things I ever wrote as far as book reviews. And now I can’t really remember the story, except that it completely engulfed me at the time.

“Ali in Wonderland: And Other Tall Tales” by Ali Wentworth. She’s an actress that is now married to George Stephanopoulos, and although it's a slight and silly book, she’s very, very honest and open and kind of frank and vulgar about trying to make it as an actress and her courtship with George.

“Getting Real” by Gretchen Carlson. A typical biography of how she became Miss America and then got into journalism, especially interesting to me as she worked at a television station in my hometown and I knew some of the people she writes about and what she left out of her story.

“Joy: Poet, Seeker, and the Woman Who Captivated C.S. Lewis” by Abigail Santamaria. A really odd story about a fan stalker woman who actually bagged her prey, an odd, famous-writer, committed bachelor in another country, and then died a drawn-out death, with her husband and his brother completely devoted to her and devastated by her loss. They made a movie out of it with Anthony Hopkins and Debra Winger called “Shadowlands.”

“It’s Not Yet Dark” by Simon Fitzmaurice. I read this because my mother-in-law had ALS and I had a morbid fascination with how the disease starts and what it feels like to be trapped inside your body, since it was awkward to talk to her about it, and in the last year when it was really bad, she didn’t talk much at all. Fitzmaurice’s wife also wrote a book from her perspective that didn’t help as much since it was mostly about escaping from her reality.

“Mother American Night: My Life in Crazy Times” by John Perry Barlow. He really lived a fascinating life actually being with all the music and political people I grew up reading about, and he had some great perspectives about the meaning of life and how to cope. One of the review copies I saved. He passed away right before the book came out.

My Love Hate Relationship with Amazon Vine -- a Long Story

Right now, I am on the outs with Amazon. Or actually, they are on the outs with me. They kicked me out of their Vine review program – more on that later – and erased 20 years of product reviews I wrote, and have banned me from reviewing products. And all for no good reason except they outsourced the Vine program – more on that later – overseas to a bunch of flunkies who cut and paste irrelevant replies to inquiries and issues, and if you get one of them on a bad day, they completely delete you from Amazon. I was, after 20 years, in the top 4,000 reviewers as far as “helpful” votes. Now I don’t exist.

In the early days of Amazon, they just sold books, and I would occasionally order a software book. It was the 1990s, and I was updating my skills in order to stay in the workforce. Then I started to find bargains – used books at 99 cents, $3.99 postage. Even at $4, it seemed like a deal. I found the histories and biographies I enjoyed and couldn’t get at the library. In the early days of my non-starter journalism career, I reviewed books for the local newspaper and enjoyed it, so I wrote reviews of the books I bought from Amazon. Some people would rate my reviews as helpful.

One day, my account said I was in the Vine program. (People online say the program started in 2007 or 2008. I don’t remember, but that’s possible.) I could click on a link to a list of advanced copies of new books twice a month, the paperback editions that book reviewers receive. They usually had no art or photos inside. There would be typos in the text. Parts like indexes or introductions would be left blank. We were told to pay no attention to those flaws as these were not the finished books, just review the content. So if I saw a book that interested me on the list, I clicked on it and it came in the mail with a big Not for Resale sticker on it. After a few years, I had to dump all these books into recycling. There was no room for them in the house, and they weren’t nice editions anyway. You couldn’t even donate them to a library.

The Vine program evolved from here. Apparently, vendors were offered what seems to me to be a bad deal. Pay Amazon several thousand dollars and let them give away free samples of your products to reviewers in order to garner some reviews and jumpstart sales. The vendor is taking a chance the reviews might be mostly bad. How is that a deal? But that’s what happened.

So the Vine list began including things that weren’t books, just as Amazon began selling things that weren’t books. There were beauty products, household products and pet foods. I had cats. I washed my hair with shampoo. I lived in a house. So when they appeared, I clicked. Sometimes you got one can or bottle. Sometimes you got a whole carton. Sometimes you got a case. More and more items were added to the Vine program. The list came out every other Thursday at 3 p.m. (on the East Coast), and I began to notice if I looked at it around that time, there was a lot on it, brand names, new products, sometimes very nice things! But if I waited a few hours or days, there would just be the usual books. The other Vine reviewers caught on to the system and got on early and kept refreshing the page, and snatched up the good stuff within seconds. I was often busy working on Thursdays, so only rarely hit a bonanza. My first was a storage cabinet.

The Vine system otherwise worked very well. You could only have five unreviewed things checked out at a time. If you were behind in your review posting, you could not click on anything new. The website kept accurate records of what you had out and what you had reviewed. There were strict rules about what you could say in a review, so I assume there were actual people reading the reviews before they went live. I never had any reason to email the Vine customer service people.

Then everything changed. First Amazon did away with the Vine reviewers forum pages. I was in agreement with that because it was a hotbed of meanness and gossip. They knew how to work the system, and they were policing other reviewers, reporting those they felt were writing fake or lazy reviews, reporting people they claimed were reselling products – which was not allowed – you couldn’t even give them away for six months. Not everyone was seeing the same lists of available products, so forum people were reporting on what was on other lists for reasons I could never fathom. They talked about people who had been kicked off Vine.

Then Vine changed the frequency that the list refreshed. Instead of every other Thursday, it was constantly. And you no longer were limited to five unreviewed items. You could select dozens of items -- everything on the list, if you wanted -- and take as long as you needed to review them. You could never review them at all and it didn’t seem to matter. Your list kept refreshing with more stuff.

The website no longer worked efficiently. Before, once you posted a review, the item disappeared instantly from your queue of Items Awaiting Review. Now, sometimes it would, but mostly it wouldn’t. You’d click on it to resubmit your review and your original review would pop up. It just wouldn’t go through. Or it would, but the text and the item would stay stuck in your queue.

This issue and the change in rules is what I thought lead to my demise as a reviewer, although the more I read other people's experiences on Reddit, I am not as sure my situation was unique or even my fault. It started when my husband was home for three months on disability and said he would write the reviews, so I gave him my password and he began looking at the list on Thursdays when it came out. He knew to get on early and refresh until the list appeared. He scored some big items and became a junkie.

It was manageable at first because he was restrained by having to get his reviews in before he could click again. When they stopped that requirement, the UPS truck was pulling up on a daily basis. It was too much. It was Christmas morning every day. It was stuff that was fun or interesting for a few hours, but then he’d lose interest. He fell behind on his share of the reviews.

Vine also had a bad habit of piling on with similar products. Like, they’d put up a vacuum cleaner, and you’d think, great, I can use a new vacuum cleaner! Then a week or so later, there’d be another one, a better one! So you’d get that one. Then a month later, an even better one! Before you knew it, you had eight vacuum cleaners. There were printers, computers, furniture. If you didn’t mind that none of your chairs matched, you could have a house full of chairs. One year, there was a lot of costume jewelry. We each ended up with a box of watches. There was clothes, shoes, vitamins, over the counter medicine, household cleaning products. Always too much. Instead of a package of paper towels, you’d be sent a box of 48 rolls. 

Over dinner, I would read out the list of items my husband had clicked on and force him to verbally review them. There was usually 15-20 items, and I could get him to talk about maybe 10. Being a wildly efficient person, I would then write his 10 reviews and post them. This would trigger an algorithm at Amazon that I was a spammer and half or more of them would be rejected as "unverified purchases." I would be blocked out of resubmitting the reviews that didn’t go through.

Meanwhile, my own, timely, efficiently submitted reviews of my items were going through, but the items were staying stuck in my Awaiting Review queue. I was writing weekly emails to Vine customer service asking for help fixing this situation and they were cutting and pasting irrelevant answers back to me. I was reviewing unverified purchases, they said. But they’re Vine items, not purchases? I had a personal relationship with the Vine vendors. But I did not know the Vine vendors and no one was paying me for a good review? My review violated community guidelines. But my review is five stars and just says it’s a great item that works well?

After enough of these irrelevant and untrue warnings, they closed down my Vine list. One day you log in and you’re locked out with the little goodbye, good luck, don’t try to change our minds notice on top. All your Vine reviews are erased. In my case, it was approximately 1,200.

About a week or two after the first time this happened, I suddenly appeared back in the program again, and a week after that, all my reviews magically reappeared. (On Reddit, I read this happened to a number of people. It was a computer glitch, and many were reinstated.) So for six more months, we pulled down a number of kitchen appliances, toys, clothes and electronic junk. My husband fell behind in his reviews again. Vine was dumping a lot of off-brand, rip-off Made in China products into the lists, poorly sewn clothes, things that didn’t work, things missing parts, things that required you to send your personal information to China in order to download an app to make it work.

It seemed like they were clearing out warehouses of discontinued products at times. You’d get a piece of furniture that had to be assembled and was missing parts, and you’d call the company’s customer service and they would say they no longer made that item. No parts. Send it back to Amazon and get a refund. But you couldn’t return Vine items. You had a pile of particle board and screws you had to haul to the dump.

Amazon had an in-house line of pantry food products and toiletries, but for some reason, clicking on them triggered error messages. The olive oil and toothpaste request went through, but the items never shipped. I should have done nothing, but I kept trying to bring order and reason to my queue, and once again was contacting customer service for help, and once again they dropped me out of Vine, only this time, they also banned me from reviewing even items I purchased. All my reviews, thousands of them over 20 years, disappeared from my Profile. And I could never review again. Don’t even try. You are blocked.

Meanwhile, Vine customer service sold or gave away my email address to Chinese vendors and I was getting emails daily from sellers of junk wanting me to buy their junk and in exchange for a review, they said they’d refund all or part of the purchase price into a Paypal account. I delete all of them. They keep coming. Who sold my email address to them? It does not appear on my Amazon profile. Between the rip-off non-brand products from Asia, the lack of incentive to actually review, the discontinued stock dumps, and the outsourced customer service reps, Vine was becoming an unpleasant chore.

Still, when you’re dumped off the gravy train, it’s like coming off heroin. How will I live without checking the list two or three times a day? How can I survive without boxes coming every day? We got a second recycling container to hold all the cardboard we flattened. True, it’s not like it was completely free. A few years ago, Amazon required you hand over your social security number to continue in Vine and they report the tax value of what they sent you to the IRS, so you have to report it as income on your taxes. Some items like food or beauty products had no tax value, but some crazy things had a tax value higher than the selling price. Vine was a mess. (And in early 2019 the New York Times reported that a glitch had delivered all the Vine email addresses into the hands of the Asian scammers, so possibly our social security numbers as well?)

Looking around my house now, it’s like 80 percent Vine things. I will miss being introduced to some really nice things I liked and would not have been brave enough to try or buy otherwise, like a citrus juicer and a toaster oven. On Facebook, I posted links to the 30 or so items over a couple of thousand that won my heart. I will miss the cat food that not only helped me support all my cats, but fed the neighborhood strays as well. I will miss the improvement Vine made in my husband’s wardrobe.

Thinking my situation was unique and unfair, I searched the Amazon website for the very well-hidden telephone number you can call to actually talk to a human. But the first human I got was Muhammed with a British accent, so I figured I was outsourced again to India where they really didn’t care about anyone’s Vine issues. The second time I got Crystal, who sounded possibly like she was in America, but she had never heard of Amazon Vine. I had to explain the whole program to her. She pretty much told me she had no idea what to do about it. I got form letters after the calls from both of them. They didn’t do anything to help, but asked me to rate them.

Amazon still sends me questions from customers about products I bought or received. Can you answer their question? I do, then they delete it with the message, you are not allowed to help customers. You are a bad rule violater.

I started to search the Internet for other Vine victims and found a bunch on Reddit, all with identical stories to mine. The one thing we may all have had in common was writing too many reviews at the same time. Several of the other victims talked about how they went months and months without reviewing anything, getting dozens and dozens of reviews behind, and the cut-off came not long after they finally sat down and caught up. One poor guy used his time getting chemotherapy to catch up on reviews, and he got dismissed.

I heard on the news this week that Amazon was now the biggest company on the stock market, toppling Apple and Microsoft. Jeff Bezos, the man who started Amazon selling books online out of his garage, is the richest man in the world. In the whole world! Today, the news says his net worth is $137 billion and his wife is divorcing him.

Amazon is so huge, you can’t quit them. I love my Echo, which I bought, and it requires an Amazon prime membership. Amazon has things you can’t find anywhere else. It would take me driving from store to store to store to search for some things and possibly not find them, but I can find it on Amazon in minutes and have delivered in two days. If I can't find it on Amazon, it doesn't exist. So I can’t really quit Amazon in protest over my hurt feelings about being falsely accused and convicted of writing reviews for unverified purchases or colluding with Chinese vendors. I am in too deep.